I started this blog about a year ago and as you can see, I have taken an extended break in posting. This is my “get back on the wagon” post. The one that, truthfully, I’ve been avoiding and borderline dreading for the last six-ish months. I have had a bit of a hard time finding my real and authentic voice for a while now. Not because I don’t know what it looks or sounds like, but, because a big part of me is afraid that no one will like it. It is so easy to get caught up in Instagram followers and Facebook likes. It’s become standard to present curated perfection. And, while I love a beautiful interior or a perfectly edited shot, I am having a bit of a struggle with the real life portion.
I am an interior designer. A perfectly decorated space makes my heart pitter patter, but, I am not sure who actually lives in those spaces. I mean, I get it, no one wants to see pics of what my living room looks like on a rainy day with a toddler—It’s way prettier when the pillows are fluffed, the coffee table is perfectly positioned, and there are fresh flowers on the table. Hell, sometimes I look at those pictures just to remind myself of what it could look like.
But, and this is the part I keep going back to, LIFE IS MESSY. My life is messy. I work really hard to keep my house picked up and clean, but it never looks like it does in the pics on my blog. Mostly because I am a “stay at home Mom” who works three jobs. And, here is the thing, I don’t care. At least, that’s what I tell myself. But, day after day, I am inundated with images of perfection. Of the perfect wife, mom, or friend shopping, entertaining, keeping the house spotless, making sure the kids are never bored and that supper is on the table every night. It all feels so Mad Men to me and I am kind of over it.
Can we just be real? How many of us are popping Prozac to get through the day? How many of us leave dishes in the sink until tomorrow because we just can’t do another thing tonight? How many of us go to bed embarrassingly early with the house a disaster because we just want to start over tomorrow? How many of us have to restart the washer, because the now clean laundry has been sitting too long and is starting to stink? ME, ME, ME, ME… But, we don’t talk about that part. No, we clear off the counter and take 107 shots of the one clean spot in our house, post it, and pretend that it’s real life. And, here’s the part that wears me down the most: There is this sort of shaming that goes on beneath all of this. I’m guilty of it, I’m doing it right now. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. If your house is spotless and you shop the #NSale and don’t seem to have a care in the world, people (other women) judge you. If your house is never clean, your kids are sitting in front of the TV so that you can get one moments peace, people (other women) judge you. With the onslaught of social media and curated moments this silent shaming we partake in is magnified 100%.
In the midst of all of these “feelings,” I’ve officially launched my interior design business and I am so pumped to start sharing it here. I just don’t want to lose sight of what’s real. I have such a passion for interior design. For making a house a home—a functional, beautiful, purposeful space. And, that means a lot of different things to a lot of different people.
So, here’s to finding the happy medium. To celebrating the good, the bad, and the ugly. To giving ourselves and our fellow ladies some grace. To not judging one way or the other. To lifting each other up and to appreciating the beautiful, the messy, and everything in-between.
In the spirit of real life, here are some Social Media vs. Reality pics of my house to make you feel better about yours.
Home Tour Photo: Kitchen
Real Time Photo: Kitchen
Yes. That is a lady bug potty sitting in the middle of the living room floor. That yellow wire you ask? It’s where the vent hood is supposed to be. Instead, It is sitting in the shed and the wires are visable in all their glory. You can’t see it, but, the sink is full of dishes.
House Tour Photo: Living Room
Real Time Photo: Living Room